You will be hard pressed to find a bigger Marvel fan than your boy Steviepoooooo. I have a cat named T’challa, a Hummer named Namor, a vacuum named Tony Shark. A replica of Thor’s new axe Storm Breaker mounted on the wall. A studio quality Iron Man helmet that I like to wear during adult time with Mrs. Steviepoooooo 😉 The list goes on and on.
Now that you are picturing me wearing nothing besides an Iron Man helmet, let’s get into the nitty gritty of the latest entry into the MCU, The Fantastic Four.
With the exceptions of Avengers Infinity War and Endgame, and possibly Spider Man No Way Home, I cannot recall a more highly anticipated film from Marvel Studios.
The anticipation started for the mega nerds like me back in 2019 when Disney purchased Fox. This gave Marvel Studios the film rights to both The Fantastic Four and Xmen properties. There have been three previous film entries in the Fantastic Four Franchise. They were all three produced by Fox and all three sucked! The 2015 version was honestly one of the worst films I have ever seen. Your boy Steviepoooooo has watched a film called “The Attack of the Killer Tomatoes” multiple times. That should tell you just how bad the 2015 version was.
Like a lot of Marvel Fans, I was ecstatic to hear that Marvel Studios had the rights to produce their own Fantastic Four film. With President Kevin Fiege at the helm I thought we might finally get a really good Fantastic Four. The Fantastic Four are crucial to the comic world of Marvel. The fact that they had never been portrayed well on the big screen was borderline criminal.
After the Disney Fox merger years of speculation about this film followed. It was so much fun to speculate with my fellow fans about what actors Marvel would cast to bring their First Family to life. I was always rooting for John Krasinski and Emily Blunt to be cast as Reed Richards and Sue Storm respectively. Mainly because I am a huge fan of Emily Blunt and thought she would be perfect for the role.
Those two roles ended up going to Pedro Pascal and Vanessa Kirby respectively.
Vanessa Kirby was easily the best performance of Sue Storm that I have seen. I am very excited to see what she can bring to the role going forward. The Invisible Woman was never one of the more interesting characters in the books. Kirby’s performance of a hyper protective mother who would do anything to save her super powered baby was heartwarming. I would hope my mom would get into a deathmatch with a planet devouring alien to save me, but you never know.
I have been a huge fan of Pedro Pascal’s ever since he perfectly portrayed Oberyn Martell during the fourth season of Game of Thrones. Oberyn was one of my favorite characters in the Game of Thrones novels. Pedro did that character justice and was able to bring that character to life. He was able to do something similar with Reed Richards during this film.
The problem with Reed Richards is he is not Captain America. He is an awkward nerd who has stretchy powers. He is honestly pretty lame in the books. I never understood why people were so obsessed with who would play him in the new movie. Reed is usually just kind of there and moping in all the Fantastic Four stories I have read. The stars of the show are always other characters.
I think Pedro did a fine job. I have heard a lot of negative things about his performance and the character. I think he did a great job of portraying the character that the director wanted him to portray. I think it is very possible that Marvel hears the criticism about Reed and changes the personality of the character in future films. I can see him being less awkward and more charismatic going forward. I just need to repeat that Reed Richards is NOT Steve Rodgers or Tony Stark. It is unfair to expect him to be so.
In terms of charismatic leadership in the MCU going forward, whoever they cast as Cyclops is probably going to fill that role.
The MVP of the film for me was Joseph Quinn’s portrayal as Johnny Storm. Poor Mrs. Steviepooooo had to listen to her husband talk about for YEARS how Joseph Quinn is not as classically hot as Johhny Storm is supposed to be. In the books and past movies Johnny Storm is a heart throb. Quinn is far from ugly but I would never consider him hot.
Remember I am a shallow bitch, and I want the Human Torch to be so hot he makes me question my sexuality. That being said I felt Quinn was phenomenal as Johnny Storm. He brought more depth and levity to the character than I have ever seen before. The special effects with him and the Silver Surfer were breath taking.
Ebon Moss-Barach’s portrayal of the Thing was also captivating. Moss was able to bring some brevity and life to a character who is literally a walking talking rock monster. Not an easy task for anyone. Good job Ebon good job.
Overall, the reason that I labeled the film a bore was because the story was just that, boring. It is very possible that my expectations were far to high for this film. There might have been a reason that previous attempts to bring these characters to life on the big screen failed. These characters are so abstract, so zany, so corny, that it is just very hard to adapt them on the big screen.
I did not dislike the film by any means. Whether it was fair or not, I just expected more.
There was not a ton of action or humor which are usually staples of Marvel Films. There needed to be an action sequence where the Fantastic Four fought numerous enemies at the same time. Instead we only got to watch them awkwardly combat Galactus. The best action sequences in Marvel Movies are when a team of heroes combats legions of villains. For example, when the Avengers fought the alien army in the first film.
The opportunity was there to have the Fantastic Four fight Mole Man and his supporters. Instead they skipped over that sequence in favor of exposition. I was very excited to see Oscar Nominee Paul Walter Hauser portray Mole Man. Instead that character literally added nothing to the film. They might as well not have even included him.
I understood the decision to forgo the origin story of the Fantastic Four. Unfortunately, this made it hard for me to care about the characters. We didn’t know or understand them. It felt like Marvel was just expecting me to care about them instantly rather than build the characters up and make me naturally care for them. The biggest problem with the film was that I honestly could not have cared less if Galactus ate their planet. I was actually rooting for Galactus by the end of the film.
All in all, I am still moderately excited to see where Marvel goes with these characters going forward. There is plenty of room for improvement. It was easily the best Fantastic Four movie I have ever seen. Sadly, that is not saying much.
In the battle of Superman vs Fantastic Four, Steviepooooo gives the victory to James Gunn and Superman by a large margin.
Enjoy the heatwaves and I will see you all Thursday!
A bientot!
Bennie's Blasts 
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